I make no excuses for accumulating this debt. I take the responsibility for ALL of it. I think that is the first step in dealing with it...OWNING it!
We really aren't extravagant people. We aren't the Jones' and don't try to be, we don't have any toys (boats, RV's, fancy, new cars, etc). In fact, we don't really have anything to show for all this debt we have. Is that sad? I just can't believe how fast it all adds up. Here is how it all began.......
J and I were married in 1996. Very simple, beautiful wedding, nothing extravagant, probably didn't cost more than $5000 (possibly less than $4000). I think my dress was less than $400. J paid cash for my ring. So, no debt there.
We started out in a very humble apartment for our first 3 years of marriage. No dishwasher, no garbage disposal, no laundry facilities, no air conditioning, one bedroom, 2 clunky cars that wouldn't start on any given day. I think we paid $300 for rent, $350 when we upgraded to a 2 bedroom. Those were the days. But, we didn't care. We were in the honeymoon stages of life.
In 1998 we had our first child, M. She was the best thing that had happened to us so far. Unfortunately, we paid the cost. This is where it all started. My pregnancy was HORRIFIC. Short story, I was on a Home IV care (pic-line) for the first 6 months. J missed a lot of work to take care of me and be my nurse. Obviously I couldn't work as much. So our income was low that year. I think this is when we got our first credit card, "just in case," we said!
In 1999, J landed a great job with a BIG Financial Company. Ironic huh?? He works with other people's finances....but not our own. We never have been good about saving or planning for anything. We just live, day by day, in the moment. Which, I don't understand, because HIS parents are amazing examples of saving and living financially within their means and they still enjoy everything life has to offer. Why couldn't J have learned that from them? My family too, is very good with money. My mom and sisters are the QUEENS of bargain shopping and spending. Even though my Dad shops ONLY at Nordstroms and won't drive anything but a Mercedes, he is smart with his money too!! We both grew up neither rich nor poor, we were among the Middle class, I would say.
In 2000, we were making more money at the BIG Financial Company and expecting our 2nd child, J. So, we bought a house and doubled our payment to around $750. We still had 2 clunky cars that wouldn't start on any given day. BUT, we had a dishwasher, disposal, laundry hook-ups, air conditioning, and a fenced yard. We were living large. This pregnancy was better, but, occasionally, I still needed J to take care of me and be my nurse, especially with another little one at home.
By this time, we were really starting to use credit cards. Especially with me not working and J missing quite a bit of work to take care of his growing family. I think we were kidding ourselves into thinking that it would all work out and we would deal with it "someday". We were playing house, rather than working for it. We had 2 beautiful kids and a cute little house. I enjoyed decorating the house and shopping for cute clothes for the kids. I also found myself to be quite the little entrepreneur, trying every home business out there. Believe me when I say EVERY home business. Piano lessons, an in-home preschool, kitchen tools, music, craft fairs, boutiques, jewelry, weight loss products, and yes, even a paper route (in my clunker car, with 2 kids in carseats in the back seat). This added to the debt too. It takes money to start a business, no matter what you think. J rolled his eyes every time I had a new idea, but supported me everytime.
By 2003 we found ourselves in more debt and pregnant with TWINS. J had gone back to school to finish his degree (more debt). He still was working for the Financial Company. I was sicker than ever with this pregnancy. IV-Home Care for 6 months, threats of feeding tubes and hospitalization, not to mention, near death experiences. Needless to say, J missed a LOT of work that year. By now this was a habit that we had both gotten used to. A habit that would become our worst enemy. The hardest habit to break. He loves being home with the kids (he is a better Mr. Mom than I am) and I LOVE having him home. FMLA saved his job but kept enabling us every year.
By 2006 we had an 8 yr old, 6 yr old and 3 yr old twins. Our debt, by this time, had reached an all time high...so we thought we should buy a bigger, more expensive house. Wasn't that a smart decision?? We even got a good deal on the bigger house. Our parents helped pay off some of our debt so that we could afford the bigger house payment. Even smarter huh? Now we are in debt with them. BUT, we thought we could afford it because J was making more at the Big Financial Company and the availability of overtime was doubling his paychecks. So, we were depending on this overtime to make our house payment. The smartest financial thing we've done to date.
We did double our income in 2007. That was our best year. Overtime was a good thing. Little did we know that after 8 years of having available OT a possibility, it was about to disappear. At this point, we were NOT accummulating any new debt, but we weren't paying any of it down either, just the minimum. We had reached our max, we could not get any more Credit Cards. Rumors were starting at J's job that OT might slowly disappear because of a falling economy. So, by Fall of 2008 we put the nice, big house up for Sale.
By the middle of 2009, OT was gone. The house was still up for sale and it was getting harder to keep up with our payments. Thankfully, the house sold in October 2009 and we are now renting a cute, smaller home (just the right size and affordable) 3 miles down the road. With the move, we were able to downsize A LOT of our belongings to just the things we NEEDED. I have embraced SIMPLICITY!! Bigger homes, toys, etc, are OVERRATED!! You can't take them with you when you die. My husband, children and family is what matters most. I CAN take them with me.
So 2010 is the year I simplify my life. Now that all the kids are in school, I have gone back to work full-time in something I LOVE to do......TEACH children. With both J and I working full-time, we have decided to tackle our debt, simplify our lives and enjoy our children while we can. I will journal our experiences, ups and downs, mistakes and successes on this blog. I hope it will inspire you, but most importantly, inspire me, J and our children to live happier, simpler, financially free lives.
Here is to being FINANCIALLY FREE!!!!
Lower Maintenance Yard – Goals
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